Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
