Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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