This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
