i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
