i just google imaged poop.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
