It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize