She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
