why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
