pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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