I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
