White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize
