No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
its not stalking. its research.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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