Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
