i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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