I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm having to shit out rocks
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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