Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize