What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
