Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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