She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize