i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
