What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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