doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
