woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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