Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
He shit in the fireplace
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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