Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
