We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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