last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize