Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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