Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
They have beer where we have blood.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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