Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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