okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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