I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize