I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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