Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
you didnt know i had herpes?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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