Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
vagina is talking i cant
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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