omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize