And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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