He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
