dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
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