she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
