you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
