I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
