thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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