All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
