singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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