I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize