Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
