I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize