i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
