She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
